Nothing will make you feel a bit lifted than being around a 4 year old. My mom and I ended up taking Addison to her dance class this afternoon - its a perfect type of task for me - its only an hour and I get to hang and then listen to her talk in the car and sit while she is at her class and then head back home. Just over and hour - enough smiles without too much exhaustion. She was having a rough day - or I should say a typical day for a 4 year old - laughing one second crying the next - it all is oddly calming to me as I think oh sweetheart i feel like doing the same thing!
As I was getting the little one in the carseat she asked me what was on my shirt - and I told her it was a Buddha - and she asked what's a Buddha - and as we are running late and I thought what is the easiest answer for a 4 year old - so i said - a Buddha watches over you and helps you feel safe. Seemed to do the trick - and then I said okay missy can you please get your booty into this car seat asap - and she laughed with the similarity of Buddha and Booty - and kept saying - My Buddha is my booty -I'm putting my Buddha in the car seat.... and she was cracking herself up - and us too.
So I called her my little Buddha - and that she is - one who brings me joy, peace and makes me feel safe - thanks my sweet girl. As we were leaving dance i was thinking about how this illness makes it so difficult to have or care for anyone let alone a dependent child - but if you can handle it - the trade off is priceless. I am lucky I have not only my niece and nephew - but my friends that are so generous with their time and their children to help lift my spirits.
A few weeks back when my friends and their children stopped by and I had no choice but to head to bed while they were here - I loved how 3 of them piled in my room - played with their toys on the chair completely unfazed by their "aunt" lying in bed a few feet from them - and then the oldest seeing my oblivion had a very easy time pleading her case that she needed another back pack buddy so her two best friends wouldn't feel left out! Little did she know at that moment she could have asked for anything and I would have said yes! So I enjoyed listening to her tell her mom in the other room that yep, Heather said I could have another one...there is something that makes you feel safe when you are in the other room lying down feeling sick but others are just around the corner going about the rest of the evening - laughing - drinking - kids fighting - it reminded me of when I was little and would fall asleep to the muffled sounds of parents having a party - the white noise that all was okay and you could rest easy...
well - just wanted to jot a bit of the good stuff down - xo hkd