Unconditional
I wasn't incorrect when I said the next 30 days would be a push. I was brushing my teeth when I just kept thinking, blood, blood, blood - So today, I wasn't surprised when we were at it again, and I didn't cry - wasn't as nervous, I was just hoping I would feel better. Last night I felt like I was starving for oxygen - despite not having any Lung conditions. That's another way to describe what if feels like to be so fatigued, your cells just don't seem to be garnering their duties.
An amazing thing happened today after my treatment - I felt instantly better. As we were driving home I couldn't stop saying it out loud - random thoughts..."wow, this is what if feels like to feel normal, I feel like I can breathe better - please last, the tightness ever lingering in my throat has diminished - wow - I feel normal, everything is clearer, sharper." A calmness that also rarely makes an appearance also washed over me - peace, a moment of peace from the usual turmoil that seems to be raging inside.
That is what would happen in a healthy person, the UV Photophoresis, plus induction of oxygen would give you a lift, but when your sick it's properties are helping your body fight - therefore all the flu like reactions post treatment. Hopefully this increase in my tolerance for the treatments will begin to have exponential pay-offs. I am thankful. I am hopeful. I am thankful. I am hopeful.