Tuesday, February 15, 2011
I have one hour and fifteen minutes, to find enough energy to pick up my best friend's daughter from school, take her for a treat and then dance class. Its our special day that we were suppose to do a two weeks ago, but the snow storm of the decade hit, so class was canceled. Its almost 2pm, I dragged out of bed at 11am, one of those days that making a list of eat, shower, feed dog, let dog out is so overwhelming - please energy kick in, kick in, kick in, i am so tired of disappointing people - that is what i hate most - being a very dependable person stuck in an undependable body. My mom is stopping by the grocery store to pick me up something more to eat, the fear of not having people around to help gets overwhelming too. All I have to do is have the energy for two hours, two out of twenty-four that's all I am asking for, two hours to not disappoint the 5 year old that has told her kindergarten class that she has a special day - please fatigue go away, take a break from me for two hours. The ordinary day feels like the last mile of a marathon - it becomes mind over body - that's the best way i know how to describe it. Two hours.